boleh x????

in my life, im the kind of girl that holds everything to myself....im absorbing others problem and stress...
i always ask everyone around me if he or she is okay but to be honest i also need some one or they to ask me am i okay or not...no one really do that for me...that's one of the thing that make me feel like no one actually care about me.....
i don't know if it is just me or everyone i close with or the one that i'm comfortable with always be taken by someone else....am i bored or what??
i want a person that are there for me, taking care of me and i dont want him or her like forget me slowly.....im so afraid of losing the one that close with me, friends, family and everything.......
i have a bestfriend, he is like my brother, enemy and everything (except the thing that involved heart issue)...i am really close with him, we go anywhere together...back in the college, we had lunch together for almost everyday....i felt like i have found someone that will be my friend until i die...you know the kind of feeling that you're really comfortable with....well thing aren't sweet and shine forever....i know that all of his secrets and i know he like this one girl....
and then both of us went to some kind of program related to our scholarship and that girl is there too....at first yeah...its okay but i am also a girl....i started to have the left-alone feeling although physically he is by my side all the time but he kept talking and asking me about that girl...i am okay with it but its getting annoying and i feel like i am no longer important...he just like blinded by the girl....
he always text me saying or asking about her....he used to take care of me (like asking me about my meals, my health)- something that a very close friend would do but now, no more....i kinda miss the care from him and now i am facing a difficult time so i hope for the kind of situation where he is there for me to like pour out all of the problem that i kept hidden for month.....without that girl of course....
*i just need moments where he's there only for me.....it may sound selfish but that is the only thing i ask for.....pleaseeeeeeee................just really be there, not only the body but also the mind.....i need u my buddy