apa nie...

going to the doc earlier, about my hand....
and guess what...she referred me to the orthopedic specialist... im afraid, feeling depressed and scared...
what is happening to me?
feel like crying....really do...

#God please give me strength.....more like dont have tears to cry

help needed.....

x tw apa yg sedang berlaku sekarang??
everything seems really complex....and my self? well i'm emotively disorder.. i feel like crying, laughing, giggling and shouting at the same time, mixed emotions ....i hate unsure things....
should i cry or not...i really need someone that i can hug....
actually, maybe i just thinking so much and the main reason for that is i'm afraid of getting hurt and  losing.... one more thing.. i think a lot about my buddy's problem...i feel so sorry for him because he know the truth about his love on his 18's birthday wish is today...
a doubled life story....
can i get a break??
tomorrow, all of us here will start our classes...i need time to settle things up...
my heart is totally stuffed up with so many things.....i need someone....seriously....

ape yg sebenarnya??

aku ad kenal thism one boy yg smemangnya aku TERsuka laa jugak...ak nie jenis really herd to like somebody but when i like a person, i likes him hardly....hahahaha...entah betol ke tidak...
months ago, i knew him on a program....love at first sight maybe, i like him since the first time i saw him, with a purple shirt...
things turned out that me the only one who like him but his was not...its ok for me coz i know that if u like someone it dosent mean that they need to like u back....so i kept stalking him (not really, just fixed my eyes on him)....
so, ak slalu perhatikan dye...hehhehe...stalker..but i dont really speak to him....just a silence watcher....
the program ended, he asked me for my number and maybe that's the end...on the closing ceremony, which was also my birthday, he sang a happy birthday song for me on stage...i was like wow.....stunned where i stand...it felt like .... fairy-tale....
days went by, he started to text me....he's sweet and cute, just the way i like it...he's cool....n his smile, wow...seunggi-like smile...
a month later, he seemed like disappeared...no text, no nothing....i started to give up...just then he called me...i was shocked...i really do miss him at that time...
since then, he called me every weekend, singing songs to me and so on....
as a normal girl, of course i touched...
and then i knew there was another girl...i started to look for info so that i wont get hurt...i dont want to hope for anything unsure...
then it happened that the girl liked him also, and so do him...i was a little bit down but i'm okay...it dosent hurt that much...
i started to make gap between us...
i pretended i dont know him....i dont pick his calls, dont reply his texts....
i think this is better for both of us...
then the girl know about us,means the past...she asked me about that..to avoid any misunderstanding i told her the truth...
it turns out that she also get the songs and everythinngs like i do from him...
then, everything went silence.....
he sometimes text me out of the blue, call me but i dont really pick it up...
i made a gap so that the another girl wont hurt although i'm hurting myself..
time passes by...
he never give up on texting and appearing in my chat box...
he is now starting to vdeo calling me...
he asked me to listen to a korean song....it is a really sweet song...i asked another girl about the song and she dont know it, thats means that he dosent give the same song to her...
*what in the world.....
now, i'm figuring things up....
i was just joking with him asking weather he is chatting with the girl and he strongly deny it...
so now....i'm confused
# what is going on now and what should i do??!!??

undefined

anyeong......kwenchannayeo???

niga, noemu apeun yeo....nae chingu...ahh chinchayeo....

alot of things happened these days that really change my life and my mind..im so sad...so depressed and stressed up..the college life, well i need to change college as the requirement to fly is 3.5 and above and also we could only go to the IVY LEAGUE universities that are only 8 of them existed in this world. wow!!! that's what we call crazy dear children....(imagining i'm the teacher)...hahhaha

i have like a huge amount stress on top of my head, killing me inside out and i lost my weight more and more from day to day... i really get skinnier....cool and scary....

and musa is getting more cute from time to time....hahaha...(biasala budak nak membesar)

i feel a little bit sad because i need to leave my friends at INTEC....i miss hajar so damn much (i never tough of saying it)  but that's the fact... hajar-ah noemu bogoshippoyeo.......

currently at SOLS HQ.....spending days here with friends and buddy.....

#aHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*going crazy